Current Casting

Dear all,

We are about to start casting for our Christmas Show - It is a very funny new musical (bit rude too) and we do need actors with good singing voices.

Playing at the UNION THEATRE

9th December to 16th January

Tuesday to Saturday @ 7.30pm

Sundays @ 3pm

LAST SHOW BEFORE XMAS ON 20TH DEC. REOPEN ON JAN 5TH TO GIVE EVERYONE A GOOD BREAK.

Rehearsing from 16th November

Auditions on Sat 21st October and Monday 2nd November

PLEASE E-MAIL YOUR CV AND HEAD SHOT TO UNIONCASTING@LIVE.COM. IF YOU HAVE SENT IN YOUR CV BEFORE PLEASE RE-SUBMIT AS WE DON'T KEEP PREVIOUS SUBMISSIONS ON FILE. I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU ALL.

This is a profit share production.

SASHA x

FEMALE ROLES

TWIRLY- Chavvy young girl. Possibly over weight. A real ordinary girl with an extraordinary singing and dancing ability. B3 - E5 - Mezzo belt with strong lyric headvoice.

TUMULUS SCRAG- the drug dealer. Hunched and wizened fairy god mother with a ‘street’ accent.

Doubles as HANKY BEATMEAT- Thinks he’s god’s gift to women. A real smoothy and a lech.

POLONIA QUIM - Dancer.

Doubles as TAMMY FLU-. Think Amanda from Ugly Betty or Paris Hilton. American accent.

POTTY LOVE HEWITT – American “air head” celebrity.

Doubles as WHIMSEY GUFF the dancer.

MALE ROLES

MERKIN- the Gnome. Short and repressed but full of love. Somewhat shy but does an amazing dance to save the day. B2 - Ab4 - Gospel/Soul Tenor with some (reasonably limited) falsetto

TRANNY DRIP- Rough transvestite dame with a course, down to earth manner. Possibly Northern accent. Bb2 - Eb4 - Character Baritone

REGINA DRIP- Rough transvestite dame. Possibly Northern accent. Former soap star, slightly more refined than her sister. Bb2 - Eb4 - Character Baritone

FLETCH- Squat owner of the nightclub. Insecure and domineering.

Doubles as ARTY BUMFESTEN- Producer of Pantoenders. Mockney and full of personality. And as MYSTERY CELEB- Gnome made into a celebrity. Eb3 - E4 - MT Bari/Tenor

PRINCE ALCOCK- ultra good looking hunk and total charmer. Initially self serving but ultimately a lovely guy. Doubles as DRIBBLES MCGUIRE the dancer.

MALE OR FEMALE ROLES

MR SODDEMARD- Greasy and obsequious social worker.

Doubles as EATS WITHASPOON American American accent.